Thursday, July 01, 2010

On Monday, I was driving down the valley to go run some pre-trip errands in the "big city". My three girls were with me, indulging in one of their favorite recent pastimes: discussing all the tasty things they want to eat while they are visiting the USA this summer.

Top on the list is always Taco Bell. It may seem odd, but if you're a kid who only gets this stuff once every three years or so, I suppose you might really get to craving a fast food taco or two.

Then there are the breakfast cereals.
"Lucky Charms " Mallory announced. "Lucky Charms are the MOST delicious!"
"What about Froot Loops? We'll have Froot Loops, right?" Alexa chimed in, concerned that her favorite not be left out.
"That stuff tastes like mutant chemicals. " Tya sniffed from the front passenger seat.
"But it's goooood mutant chemicals!" Alexa insisted.
Mallory ignored the controversy.
"I like popsicles! We'll get popsicles? Right, mom?"
"Mmmmm." I answered, concentrating on the road, but giving it a vaguely positive intonation.
"And root beer?"

The other girls were quiet and let the master work. Mal was on a roll.

"And Cinnabon rolls? And Valentino's buffet? And Mountain Dew?"
"Mmmmmm!" I repeated, taking a particulary tricky curve. (People who have lived here for years have managed to drive off this road, tumble off the edge, down the to the valley floor and die in flames. I SO do not want to do that.)
"And those waffles? With that chocolate stuff?"
"Mmmmmm?" I inquired.
I hadn't heard this one before.
"You know! The frozen ones made by that strange white baking creature."
"Strange white...?" I said, baffled.
But then the light began to dawn.
"Yeah, mom!" Alexa chimed in "The little thing with the creepy staring black eyes!"
That clinched it.

Luckily, the hard part of my drive was over and I was able to safely laugh uproariously for a good long time at this very accurate description of the dreaded Pillsbury Poppin' Fresh Doughboy.

I am SO calling it "that strange white baking creature" from now on.


oreneta said...

You're kids are a scream....and so much like mine...though mine tend to crave pickles, vietnamese soup, pieroges....seems I'm a witch and they don't know about the other stuff or something...

Beth said...

I am throwing my parents to the wolves on this one. I TOTALLY blame them! They have become a God and Goddess in the eyes of my kids by buying them every bit of junk that their hearts desire.
I have to admit that I've never fought it. It's only every two or three years and just for a few weeks. Then they get back home to stir-fried tofu...

Teacher Mommy said...

Bwahahahaha!!!! Oh yes. Perfect. He is kinda creepy, isn't he?

Kelly said...

I grew up in the southern US and I look forward to fried catfish, GOOD donuts, and really good pork BBQ. I think there was a recall on Froot Loops lately....:(

babzee said...

Nice that Tya's tastes have matured: she gives lip service to the superiority of French cuisine, no matter what her tongue might think. At least your children can rest assured that no little ponies will be trotted onto the dining tables of any Americans who hosts you. Not yet, anyway.

Beth said...

Froot Loop recall? Gads! What's the world coming to?

Tya has mad love for Slim Jims and Mountain Dew- this alone precludes any charges of (or false credit with) food snobbery

No horsemeat is a definite plus!

Joy said...

I am still giggling, a day later, from "that strange white baking creature". Sums him up perfectly, lol!

Junk food is a lovely treat sometimes. From the Canadian side of things, we (OK, I) craved dill pickle chips while we were away. That, and A&W...