So, it turned out that the twins and their little friends did NOT perform their dance recital chanting "Thees my sheet" in front of hundreds of parents and children. When the twins told me on Friday night that the teacher had said they wouldn't be doing that song at the show, I thought 'What a relief!' They would only perform two dances and 'Hollaback Girl' would not be one of them! So, it was with a complete lack of trepidation that I enjoyed the first part of last night's show.


Severin's fencing team did a wonderful demonstration. Fencing is, like, HARD! Everything has funny names and you have to hold yourself just so. You don't get to swash and buckle however you please. It's very disciplined. And I have to add that Severin looked SO handsome! I have been humiliating him with my near-constant comments on how darn good-looking that boy is. But then, if your own mom doesn't think the sun rises and sets on you, what's the point of having one?


Next, we watched the gymnastics routines (3 different groups) , the circus acts, the hip-hop dances (3 too!!) , the ballet dance, and the Japanese stick fighting. The latter, an activity with only 3 children in it, seemed to go on forever. Considering the fact that there were only three sets of fond parents in the audience that had any interest at all in the proceedings, they would have done well to cut it to a more reasonable length. Folks are mostly kind, but they can only spend so long watching three kids they don't know wave sticks around in slow motion. After about 15 minutes, you've really seen all you need to. If I'd had my own stick, I might have taken a whack at the teacher. He was out of control and needed to be taken down- a boring, pedantic French guy that seems to have the mistaken idea that he is neither of these things.


The stick fighting ended, eventually. Then it was time for the first dance of the twins' modern dance group. The music started like this, and I quote:

Lift your leg up (so petite, so sexy)
Lift your leg up (come on sexy girl, feel me)
Lift your leg up (I want you to come show me, alright)
Lift your leg up, lift your leg up (sexy girl)
Lift your leg up
Yo, you're so sexy, you're so damn fine
Step in every place, you look so divine
Man you are magical, you're one of a kind
When you are ready, come have a good time

It made 'Hollaback Girl" look like a powerful, profound anthem of female empowerment.
It made me want to say: I'm sorry I was so finicky! Bring back Gwen!!


The girls were very cute, of course. They danced so well and the crowd cheered wildly because they were so darn glad not to be watching a fourth hip-hop group or, god forbid, more Japanese stick fighting.


(The song was "Zookey" by a DJ called Yves Larock. Maybe he had to give himself such a painfully obvious "cool" stage name because he's Swiss. It's got to be hard to have rock cred when you're Swiss. You've got centuries of watch-making and cow-milking cred working against you.)


There were a few more acts, then it was time for the final dance. It's a tradition that the modern dance group do the show finale. And I have to admit, I was a little nervous. What song would they be dancing to? 'Baby Got Back' seemed like a likely candidate.


But not to worry! It turned out to be a Russian dance club song- instrumental only! No lyrics!


And here they are at the end of the show.


A good time was had by all, especially us.