I had to quit reading the book. Acually, I might have to burn it and then devote the rest of my life to hunting down all the other copies in the world and destroying them as well.

On page 41 there was a SEX scene and Mr. Darcy's penis is referred to as "his torch of love".

The ashes will have to be scattered in the desert and I'd better have an exorcist present, just in case.
Then, I'm afraid I'm going to have to track down and kill Ms. Berdoll to prevent her from writing any other books.